Change

Okay, so a lot has changed in the last few weeks. I finally finished my last paper for Cedarville. This means that I will finally be recieving my degree! Better late than never. I've been praying for a while for God to make a way for Jess and me to live in the same state. I've also been praying for a new job. The Erie construction showroom closed down and I was facing unemployment. Well, God has answered both prayers by supplying me with a job in North Carolina. I am the new assistant manager of the Starbucks in Skyland, NC. I'm planning on this being a temporary position until I can start on my writing career. I am excited and more than a bit nervous. I don't like the thought pf moving away from my home, my family, and my church, but God knws what He is doing and I have to trust Him. Besides, Jess is really excited about my moving and I have to admit that it will be really nice to see her mnore than once a month.

I miss you all and really want to see everyone. We need some more weddings or something that we can all meet at. John, I'm talking to you. You too Carrie and Ted. Don't make me get married just to see you all again.

On a completely unrelated note my cousin, Jason Howard, is on his way to becoming a famous comic book artist. He has been drawing comic books for many years now and he has finally gotten a big break. He is working with Image comic book writer, Robert Kirkman. Kirkman also works for Marvel Comics. He is quickly becoming one of the best comic book writers out there. My cousin's comic, "The Astounding Wolf-man," will be part of the free comic-book day so you will all be able to pick it up for free at your local comic book store. Here is the link to find out more about The Astounding Wolf-man: http://forum.newsarama.com/showthread.php?t=97888 I'm pretty stoked about this. I'm not a comic book fan, but Kirkman's comics are fun to read. They aren't the same old comic book tripe. Check it out!

A work of fiction

I wandered out of the club, my head fuzzy from the loud music and maybe just a bit of alcohol. The bright lights that lit up the parking lot beamed down at me. My eyes, tuned to the low light of the club, shied away from their blinding glow. I reached for the keys in pocket, my fingers feeling heavy and clumsy. I probably shouldn't be driving, I told myself but unlocked the car door and slid behind the steering wheel anyway. The faint scent of perfume mixed with cigarete smoke that clung to my clothes and filled the small interior of my sub-compact. I turned the key. The car radio sounded muted and low compared to the blaring din that permeated every corner of the club. My head was going to hurt tomorrow... I pulled out onto the road, the usual buzz of traffic being replaced the slow but steady flow of the night crowd. My thoughts drifted in and out, finally settling on the reason I had gone out tonight. The realization that I couldn't drown my problems started to fill my mind, but I cranked the music and hit the accelerator. The adrenaline kicked in, taking the place of everything else.  I might be able to hide from my problems, but I still had some road in front of me and there was no limit to how far I could run before they caught up to me again. Or so I thought...

Know yourself

You might be wondering what that means. How can we know ourselves or better yet, how can't we? It's strange the number of things I've learned about myself in the past few months. Being with Jessica has taught me so much about who I am and who I perceive myself to be. She is my sounding wall, my advisor, my teacher. It is different seeing myself reflected in someone else's eyes. Who am I? Am I the person that I've always thought myself to be or am I the man that she sees and loves? Why aren't the two the same? She loves me for who I am, but we don't always agree on who that is. If you've never been in a long distance relationship, I urge you to try it. It's not fun, but you really get to know someone a lot better and faster than you would ever have thought possible. Jess and I spend hours on the phone each day just talking. You can learn so much from someone when they are simply speaking their mind and not screening everything they say. We share everything with each other. She is constantly on my mind.

It's a literal blizzard outside. We might be snowed in tomorrow. The world is constantly in varying shades of white and grey. I miss the sun.

Update

It finally snowed. Two weeks after Christmas and now we get the snow. I was beginning to wonder if winter had forgotten about us. The ground is completely covered. Small crystals of ice shimmer and sparkle like diamonds in the two inches of powder coating our front yard. The trees groan and creek under their new burden. The fresh snow hangs on the branches like a new winter coat, the nakedness of fall finally being reconciled. It's just so beautiful! I know most of you don't like the snow and probably think I'm crazy, but there is nothing more beautiful than a clean, crisp winter day after a fresh snowfall. It's like the world being born anew, all of the filth of the earth being hidden under a coating of the purest white...

I'm looking for a job in NC so I can be closer to Jessica. Long distance relationship = sucks. It's strange. Things seem like they are moving fast, but time has kind of lost all meaning since we've been together. Weeks become years, and days an eternity... There is nothing that compares to being with her. Even our converstaions on the phone are surreal. It's kind of scary, but I feel as if she is a part of me that has been ripped from my side and I desperately want to get that part of me back where it belongs. Pray for us, if you think about it. I'm going down to see her in a little over two weeks. I hope to set up some interviews for that time, but no luck so far.

I'm finally writing. I started on a novel but don't ask about it. It will take a while to finish and even longer before I can show it to anyone with any amount of satisfaction. I'm just glad that I am finally doing something with my life. I still work at Erie in the mall and it still kind of sucks. I'm getting very impatient with still being there.

Well, time's up. I've got to go. I hope I haven't grossed anyone out too much. Enjoy your lives, it's the only one you've got.

Of Comb-overs and Coffee Houses

I'm stealing covert looks at this guy across the way who is talking to a girl in front of the coffee counter. He is wearing cowboy cut jeans and cowboy boots. His fingers stick casually into his hip hugging pockets, the rest of his hands resting against his hips while his thumbs fidget with his brown leather belt. His haircut is ridiculous. The part is on the extreme left of his head, the rest of his hair forming a giant wave that reaches all the way across his head, eventually crashing against his right ear. It can only be described as a comb-over. Since when did comb-overs become popular among the non-balding men of the world? Are bald-men becoming so cool that even men with an excess of hair are emulating the latest hide-the-shine styles?

Jessica left Friday to go back home. It was wonderful having her here. It is an odd thing to go from being alone all of the time to having someone else constantly by my side. It was a very easy transition and strangley powerful. I didn't even realize how used to it I had gotten until I pulled into the airport parking lot and tears started welling up in my eyes. She had become such a normal part of my life even in just a short time. It's the little things that she adds to me that I miss the most. Strange. We fit so seemlessly together. Whether hanging around my friends and family or just taking a walk down the road, it was as if she had always been there by my side. Many of my friends have remarked on how natural we seemed around each other as if we had been dating for years and not months. I miss her so much already. All I can say is, thank God for Verizon.